Get Excited About the Little Things

You know guys, life would be a lot more fun and happy if people got excited over the little things, and there are many of them to get excited about! You should find your daily little things to get excited about. I have compiled a small list that makes me happy and sometimes whisper "yes!" while pumping my fist.

1. Nobody being in the bathroom when you wake up in the morning so you can just pee without doing any waiting dances.
2. Laying in bed naked, watching the fire on a candle melt the sweet scented wax.
3. Watching the smoke of incense curl up into nothingness.
4. Having your favourite kind of muffin still available at the coffee shop.
5. Putting just the right amount of sugar into your tea.
6. Dancing alone in your kitchen with the music blasting.
7. Lounging in your underwear.
8. Writing the poem that just describes everything you are feeling perfectly.
9. Sweaters fresh from the dryer.
10. Sitting under a bridge and singing acapella with your friends while throwing rocks into the river.

That's just my list. Take out a pen and paper, or your word equivalent, and write down ten things that are simple but make you excited every day. Or once a week excitements. As long as it's something that makes you happy and happens more often than not.

Be happy!

Dear "Beginner" Pagans

Hey,

So this is just a little letter I write for people who consider themselves a beginner Pagan. Hi. Welcome. I am so happy you have found something you want to pursue spiritually. But here is what I ask you: What is it about you that you consider a beginner?

Is it because you don't know a lot? Fantastic! Neither do I! Ask me questions, ask others questions. Read. Stay curious. I cannot stress this enough. Choosing the Pagan path means choosing a path of constant learning. There is no one who knows everything there is to know about modern Paganism and there is no one person who has all the answers. You don't know all the answers? Congratulations on being human. And, it just means you will always have something to learn. Your life cannot be boring if you always have something new to learn. There are many ways to learn: read everything you can get your hands on (and read it critically: ask if this makes sense to you. If the answer is no, then why does it not make sense?), ask questions (ask everyone, and listen critically: ask if their answer makes sense to you. If the answer is no, then why does it not make sense? Do not be afraid to ask people to clarify), practice (learn by doing in a safe way. You can't just read about meditation, the only way to truly know how to meditate is to... meditate [as an example of course]).

Is it because you don't have any altar tools? Altar tools just HELP. You don't need all of the fancy tools other people have. I will be making a separate post on alternatives to altar tools that are free or cheap. I was once where you were: no altar tools to call my own. But now I have a fair altar with a fair collection of tools to call my own that I have collected over the past year in various ways and from various sources.

Is it because you aren't in a coven? Who needs one! You don't have to be in a coven to call yourself a witch or a Pagan. Many towns and cities will have a group of practising Pagans. My city has a small group of local witches and Pagans who get together to celebrate the Sabbats. Maybe your city/towns group isn't right for you or maybe non-existent. THAT'S OKAY! You can practice solitary while seeking out people in your local area who are interested in learning and practising with you. My best friend Miranda and I get together to learn new things together, just a few weeks ago we got together to talk about essential oils and their uses. We share resources together.

You can also meet people in the most unexpected of ways. I met my mentor in a completely unrelated group! A collective of queers who used to meet every week in my city to talk about queer (LGBT) issues and we also would do open mic nights. It was really fun but soon disintegrated, but I kept in contact with this person. She invited me to my first ever ritual, which was Samhain (excellent time, eh?) and, well, I have been with the local Pagan community ever since! I talk to her about spiritual questions and just about life in general. We hang out together and laugh together. She is on one side of the coin my spiritual mentor, but on the other hand she is an invaluable friend.

So let me just say that everyone in Paganism could consider themselves a beginner because everyone has more to learn. So, if you consider yourself a beginner, please don't beat yourself up for it. Understand that it's okay to make mistakes, we all do it! Just take a nice deep breath and remind yourself that you can do it.

/end pep talk

See ya fuckers!

-Tara

Spam 'n' Eggs - An Adventure in Processed Meats

Luncheon meat.

It comes by many names: Spam, Kam, Holiday, the list goes on. Grocery stores even have their own varieties: Compliments, Presidents choice, Great Value...

But what IS this strange phenomenon most of us know as Spam? Well, according to the can it's motherfucking mechanically separated meat. I don't know what that means but it sounds kind of gross. It's not even one specific kind of meat either, it mentions chicken and pork.

So let's grab a can and open the lid. It smells... reminiscent of cat food, but not as off-putting. In order to gets the stuf out of the can you kind of have to squeeze it until you hear a bit of a slurping-slapping noise as it unsticks itself from the sides of the can. There is a bit of a yellowish congealed... something on the outside corners. I poke at it and its cold and slimy. Gross.

I do NOT want my first attempt at eating Spam to go badly, so I decided not to eat it the way it was, but rather to slice it thin and fry it up. I fried it until it looked like well-fried bologna (red and a little brown where it was hottest). One whole can of Spam later and I have like... 12 or more slices of fried processed meat.

The moment of truth. I try a bite. It's a little crunchy on the outside from the frying and soft on the inside, but it isn't horrible. If you disregard the texture, shape, and smell it actually tastes a lot like bacon that was cooked JUST long enough.

So I guess Spam is a viable option for breakfast foods. I mean it is certainly affordable when it's about 50c a can, and if you're lucky 33c. So, as a univeristy student, it is an affordable alternative to bacon. It keeps pretty much forever, and it's really easy to fry (do NOT use oil or butter because it seems to have it's own fat pockets that melt and cook it). Of courseI wouldn't want to eat this all the time but if I wanted the flavour of bacon to go with my eggs at a more affordable price I would choose Spam again. Probably because I have three more cans under my cupboard, but if it was ever on sale I would pick up a few cans.

So, if you're feeling adventurous (or poor) pick up a can of Spam and have your own processed meat adventure!

-Tara

A new day begins bitches

My current job is kind of stressful. Don't get me wrong it's not horrible, but sometimes it just grinds my fucking gears you know? I work at a call centre for a cell phone provider and I have only been on the phones for four weeks and I have already been called numerous disgusting names from the customers. My favourite of which is "cock sucking little cunt". But hey, I don't have to worry about that anymore because yesterday I got a new job! Actually right now I am skipping my other job to do the training for this one.

The thing I am going to like about this job is that it's work that matters. I get to help people in need. People VOLUNTEER to do the same job I'm going to be paid 11$ and hour to do. It's going to be over nights four days (nights?) a week. Which is great if you're a fucking university student. There's even an opportunity to do my readings and homework there, maybe even nap if its slow because, come on, I'll be working from midnight to eight am.

For security reasons I can't tell you what my job entails or where I am being hired, but it's a not for profit organization.... So you know everyone cares. Which is super refreshing in this world where people would gladly fuck you over just to get ahead. I know you're saying "Tara, we don't know you, you can tell us." And yes, you are right, you don't know me, but if someone from work were to find out I was giving details about my job publicly on the Internet I would be fired. Right there. On the fucking spot. Maybe with a bit of sympathy but then again... What's the first rule of fight club? (For those of you who do not know its "don't talk about fight club." To know more you can pick up the book "fight club" by Chuck Palaniuk. Seriously do it. Great writer. Or of course there is the movie. It has Helena Bonham Carter AND Brad Pitt. Come on now!).

Anyway I'm rather excited to be starting this new journey in my life. I feel like I'm no longer up the river without a paddle, more like a lower middle class cruise ship cabin?

-Tara

You wanna know who the fuck I am, eh?

My name is Tara, I live in Canada, I have a best friend named Miranda, and I think things about stuff. I listen, I observe, I write, I learn. I am university student majoring in both English and Religious Studies. I am a real bitch if you cross me, but you wouldn't know it to look at me, and I prefer it that way. If you get on my wrong side prepare to have me take you down a notch while I smile at you sweetly. It's probably in your best interests to stay on my good side. The best way to do that is to not be an ass-hat.

Because of the whole "English major" thing I come off as a bit pretentious on occasion. I actually don't mean to. I read far too deeply into things sometimes. Sometimes my friends have to pause the Disney movies to tell me to shut the fuck up because I wont stop talking about the symbolism of the smallest action (do NOT get me started on the moment in Mulan when her father sets down his cane and limps to pick up his scroll).

I am as queer as a three dollar bill in both sexuality and Gender - I'll get into this in another post. If you must know what my genitalia looks like then I CAN tell you it's an inny not an outie.

I come from a small town, I like to call it where fun goes to die. Thank Godde I moved away from there after graduation. I now live in the same city I attend university and it's pretty fan-fucking-tastic. It's a rather small city, it's more like a really big small town, but I still consider it a city, especially when comparing it to where I am from. The majority of my friends here are queer too. I think I only have one friend who is both straight and cis (again, I'll get more into this in another post). This whole city, I swear, is 90% queer. I heard we could give San Fran a run for it's money in queer population (in percentage, not numbers).

It might surprise you to hear that I really like to crochet and sew. I also love baking and cooking. I'm basically your grandmother except only 20 and a lot sexier (of course, I don't know your grandmother. If you think she's sexy and want to prove me wrong, please send me a picture).

I practice Paganism, I read the tarot (my deck is the Rider Waite), and I work with semi-precious gemstones. I am learning more about the use of herbs and essential oils. I am interested in aromatherapy, the reading of auras, and in palmistry. I would love to learn more about these things, maybe they can calm me the fuck down.

I hope you enjoy this blog, it will be a purge of my thoughts. They may come in waves where I don't post for weeks then post 3 posts in a single day. I need to figure out if Blogger has a queue, because it would really fucking help me. My favourite swear is fuck, and it is my go-to word in most situations, though of course it could be one of the many Canadian stereotypes I sadly (happily?) have. Sometimes I might even make a post without swearing. it depends on how I am feeling. So if you are offended by swearing, sorry (not sorry). You can either stick around and ignore it or leave now.

And if you plan to stick around after reading about my shit, thanks, and I hope you enjoy your stay in my brain.

-Tara